Celia

Chapter 26

The tropical juice

 

Celia sat down on the rounded concrete edge enclosing the small fountain outside the annex housing the school gym. The water was turned off for the season – a sign that the advent of autumn was irreversible.

 

The small group she had just left – with Tanya, Beatrice and two-or-three guys from their parallel class – was still standing some ten yards away chattering. There had hardly been any significant change of topics being discussed.

 

She watched him as he was heading straight towards her – it was obvious that she was the one he was targeting. He nonetheless bent slightly off just before reaching the fountain making him sit cautiously down on the concrete a couple of yards from her.

 

-Simon said you wanted to know about the juice. The tropical one.

 

No introduction.

 

She glanced over at him noticing his clear dark eyes looking swiftly at her before turning their focus on the paved ground.

 

I’ve never been quite able to read Samir. Not that I know him too well either. We attend only a few common study sessions. He seems likeable enough. A little shy? – well, he did not hesitate to come straight at me now.

 

-They came with it from the cafeteria. The bottle I mean. Sure of it.

 

-Do you remember who brought it over to you?

 

She was glad he did not ask why she wished to know.

 

-It was Philip. Just after you started refereeing. I saw you kicking off the match. Your first game?

 

Celia nodded. -Ever.

 

-The old one had been empty for a while, he went on after a short break. -It was I ... pouring it ... into her cup. Some hesitation accompanied his last words.

 

-I recall it in particular because she ... made a comment about it. The juice I mean. Said something like she was the one around there drinking the most of it – and that «people seem to know I do».

 

-Was Mariam with her?

 

Shit – this sounds like an interrogation. I should let him go on telling it in his own way.

 

-Yes, she was. She wanted icecream. But we didn’t have that in the sales booth – since the only freezer was in the cafeteria.

 

Samir turned quiet.

 

I have to ask one more question.

 

-Samir – did Linda and Mariam go together from the sales booth?

 

He took a glance at her again. -Yes, at least from the booth. But whether they stayed on together ... I don’t know – there were others coming I had to take care of.

 

This all fits. Linda bought – or got? – tropical juice. Mariam wanted an icecream, but they did not sell that in the booth, and therefore Linda gave her daughter - how much later? – her credit card so that she could go to the cafeteria on her own to buy one. Linda did not accompany Mariam to the cafeteria – where was she heading ... drinking her juice? And she did not carry the juice cup when I spotted her just before ...

 

-There’s ... one more thing. His head and eyes continued to alternate focus between Celia and the ground. -I’m sure I stood in the booth for the whole time during your match. And I don’t think anyone else got anything from the juice bottle – or I’m sure no one did - before ... it happened.

 

She suddenly eyed him sharply. -Have you told this to anyone? To the police woman?

 

-They didn’t talk to me afterwards. Or later. Should I ... should I tell them?

 

I have to think. I have to do this right. And say it the right way.

 

-Yes - no. I mean, I think they should get to know it. Is it okay with you if I tell her? I know that police woman somewhat – her name is Mai.

 

At best that is a half-truth. But I would like to speak with her again.

 

-Fine, Celia. But … His voice was turning a little bit frailer – and anxious?

 

-Do you think ... do you think ... They won’t believe that I ... the poison, I mean ...

 

-Don’t talk rubbish, Samir. Why on earth should you poison Linda? And why should anyone get to think that you did?

 

She noticed that her broad smile as well as her words made the intended soothing effect, and he gave a tentative smile in return.

 

The school bell sounded for the next class.

 

Samir rose up and walked with quick steps towards the entrance door. Celia kept sitting for a moment viewing him – autumn jacket neither on nor off and blueish jeans fairly well-worn.

 

I do not think you would be capable of it either. You don’t have it in you.

Chapter 27

Dialogues by the sideline

 

A quarter of an hour remained of the training when she entered through the small gate leading onto the pitch and went up to the area where the 10-year-olds were about their activity. They were by now busy playing – divided into two groups from the team facing each other.

 

They normally played a short match as the last part of the session. After some initial exercises. The play part was always what the kids were looking forward to.

 

From the sideline she immediately spotted Sara wearing her sleeveless training vest. Within a few seconds Sara in turn discovered her mother – she stopped for a tiny moment waving – then she was back in the match.

 

She is still happy to see me when I come. I have to let that into me. I hope it will last for long. But in a few years ...?

 

Sonia’s thoughts wandered back in time – it was not always just fine to display mom or dad when the teens came about.

 

But maybe it was somewhat different for me – it was so important to me to be like the others – to be accepted without being looked upon as someone special.

 

I must do everything to take care of what I ... we have – protect it for whatever it takes. Our place – life – all there is here. This is what I want to have.

 

A sudden joy flashed through her body as Sara hit a fine pass angled across to one of her team mates. For a girl of just ten that must have been good?

 

It is strange considering what is mine ... and ours. It’s a part of me. As if I was the one running around out there. Sara is really the only one I care about in what’s going on here – none of the other girls matter.

 

-A fine bunch this as well. They’re going to get good – if they continue.

 

The voice came half sideways from behind her and blew the stream of thoughts out of her head. She made a slight turn as Peter stepped up alongside her.

 

-It’s a fine thing we are about to put the cup behind us, he went on.

 

Sonia understood what he meant by his statement, even though she was not quite sure she appreciated him saying it. She very well knew who Peter was, even if they did not have much everyday contact.  Peter was a guy whom the club was investing in. As a coach. As a referee. And in other roles.

 

She looked over at him. Mid twenties?

 

-You are coaching several of our teams?

 

It was mainly in order to say something.

 

-Right now it’s the sixteen-year-old boys and the girls at fifteen. Had the junior girls until this spring.

 

He met her eyes, and Sonia could not help noticing the tiny movements of his dimples and the intensity in his eyes – close-to radiating – as he responded to her question.

 

I am not sure you ought to coach the fifteen-year-old girls. Not if you have a habit of catching their eyes in this way.

 

She shook it off. It’s just nonsense.

 

-The one over there by the other line is mine, she said smiling back at him.

 

-I know. Wonderful kid. And she’s going to be a fabulous soccer player.

 

-I must be off. Have promised to help out down in the locker room. Peter turned away while telling her and was on his way back. She did not get to know what he was supposed to help with or whoever needed his help.

 

If someone had been watching her at this moment, they would have spotted a couple of wrinkles above her eyes. A result from something in her head. Gnawing at her - inside her.

 

You are coaching the sixteen-year-olds. There is something I ought to remember. But I’m not able to pull it out.

 

-That’s a guy who’ll give us much to be happy about. And so I think you will.

 

There seems to be more people wishing to have a chat today. Am I getting into a celebrity? Sonia smiled by herself.

 

-You made a great job at the cup. Before as well as ... right there.

 

It was impossible to be mistaken by Johnny’s calm voice.

 

It is strange to consider that a voice can be attractive as well. We usually don’t think of it that way. I respond to it – even if I have by now listened to it on many occasions.

 

-The way you handled things when the accident happened impressed me. The police – the rest of us – the team leaders – the kids.

 

It is not easy to put he right word to what occured at the cup. «Accident» might well be just as fine as anything else.

 

-Thanks, Johnny. I’m not sure I’m just as impressed myself.

 

-Take it to heart, Sonia. And we need folks like you. Who’re able to organize – to make things happen.

 

A short break. -Even though I do know that you’re first and foremost doing this for Sara. And that’s ... just fine.

 

He nodded in the direction of the girl in the yellow vest far out by the edge at the opposite side of the play area.

 

So he even knows her name. Is there anything at this club he does not know? But his nice words nonetheless feel good – he is not just anybody around here.

 

-I think it’s kind of fun, she replied. -But I guess I will never become like ... you. Have you been here ... forever?

 

She did not intend to ask this way. But he was not offended.

 

-Maybe not quite. He chortled looking at her. -But for long. This is what it came to. And my job of course. Now this is what’s left.

 

-You see, he added. -I never came as far as marrying. So this is ...life ... for me. This is what I have.

 

He is getting personal now. Then I am not quite sure what to say.

 

There was a soft slam of the cafeteria door as it was opened some dozen yards off. They both turned at the sound and watched Emma coming out and start walking towards the club stairs. She spotted them and produced a «hi» as she commenced on the uppermost steps.

 

-And her. She regretted the two words even as she pronounced them. It was neither a comment nor a question.

 

What did I actually mean by that?

 

Johnny was still following Emma with his eyes – as she had now reached the club square.

 

-Emma is … fantastic.

 

Was there a small change of tone in his voice? Was it even a bit ... warmer?

 

Johnny was already heading towards the club house.

 

He did not say «bye». It’s a little strange. But it does not matter.

 

She watched him as - on top of the stairs - he was almost running into a middle-aged man and a girl being on their way to the training area. Sonia felt good about spotting them.

 

It is great to see that they are back here. And that he brings her. I guess she’s about a year above mine? That is right – the eleven-year-olds normally train right after Sara and her team are finished. Mariam – I think that’s her name?

 

Sara was all of a sudden standing in front of here. -Someone stamped on my foot. She raised her right leg as to emphasize. -But it’s not hurting any more, she added.

 

The training was over.

 

We have to take care of what we’ve got.

 

Why does this same thought keep coming back? Almost all the time?

Chapter 28

A face with clotted blood

 

Celia heard the little click of the lock as the cafeteria door was opened from the inside. A man she did not recognize came out with the rather large «Cafeteria is open» sign and placed it between the door and the old wooden bench.

 

They are about to open the cafeteria. That probably means there is going to be a match here later tonight. Maybe the reason why we had an early session today.

 

The club always kept the cafeteria open when there was some match activity on the pitch – then there would be some spectators and therefore customers. At times in other afternoons as well – though Celia had never quite seen a pattern as to when.

 

Perhaps when the children’s teams do their training. Then there are always some parents watching their kids. Who might make a visit inside and buy something. Not that it matters for my sake.

 

She had declined the «let’s go home together» invitation from Beatrice telling her she needed to run some errand.

 

It is not quite true. Honestly I don’t really know what I’m up to. Or why I am not going straight home.

 

She passed the cafeteria and went on in the direction of the club stairs. But rather than walk down, she continued right ahead to the area beyond it. There were two small training pitches here – one with a gravel surface and the other one a normal grass pitch. They were rather rarely in use, but there were matches played here during the cup. And it was over here the sales booth – in which Samir had been serving – was set up. She could see that there were still three or four wooden boxes left at the site of the booth.

 

She turned around when she reached the wooden boxes and kept standing for a while viewing the club house, the cafeteria and the small gate in the fence leading onto the artificial turf pitch.

 

I needed to see for myself how it all looked like from the booth. When it happened. And what it is possible to see from here. That’s why I came here.

 

She still had not made the call to police-Mai. To speak about the the tropical juice bottle. Which was placed here in the booth. And from which only Linda was treated.

 

This is not my thing. I’m not supposed to be occupied with this business.

 

It is too late. She could hear her own small sigh. I cannot get it out of my head.

 

Slightly to her right was the club square – at the bottom of the stairs on the back side of the house. From the boxes where she was standing nearly the whole square was in sight, and she could follow the lower wall of the house ending at the locker room doors by the far corner. There was a lot of activity down there. Cars, players and some grown-ups.

 

It’s the junior boys. I think they are going off to an away match. And they meet here. If so Simon and Samir will be around as well.

 

She let her eyes glide across the square and spotted them – they stood chatting behind one of the cars.

 

At the same time she got aware of Beatrice and Tanya walking side-by-side down the club stairs. So Beatrice wasn’t going home after all. A tiny smile slid across Celia’s face. The junior guys are the pull – and Tanya has talked her into joining – no doubt.

 

But surely that is okay? Maybe I ought to go down and mingle a little myself? At least say «hallo» to Simon and Samir.

 

But she kept standing still. And besides she started feeling a little chilly. The body warmth from the training was about to leave her.

 

I have to get myself home before getting really cold.

 

She had been somewhat anxious before meeting Laura again. Today was the first session after the match on Tuesday. And what she said by the substitutes’ booth.

 

Laura behaved however quite normal this afternoon. Even though she did not invite me to take the warm-up exercises this time.

 

A sudden scream made Celia flinch. She sensed the image of Linda collapsing to the ground sweeping through her head. The scream came from the far corner of the square.

 

-An accident – there’s been an accident! She heard it loud and clear even if she was a fair distance away from the house corner. It was a woman shouting – but Celia did not recognize her voice.

 

A man in a sports jacket was half running towards the locker room doors. Several of the players started in the same direction.

 

Loud voices. Shouting. Noise. Questions.

 

Celia started running herself. Along the gravel. Down the stairs. So many of the junior players had already been drawn towards the locker rooms that she was unable to discern what was going on over there as she reached the paved square.

 

-Back off – go back to the cars! There is nothing for you here!

 

This voice she did know – but the calm normally characterizing Johnny speaking was absent.

 

-No! – not you! – no! This scream was even worse than the first one. Like cutting through whatever it got to. A well known voice to Celia as well – even though she had never before heard Tanya like this.

 

-Let go of my arm! Let me through! Apparently someone had grabbed Tanya by the arm and stopped her.

 

Celia managed to fight her way through the packed group of players and grown-ups. As she made it to the far house corner she spotted both locker room doors – the men’s and the women’s – wide open. A couple of yards to her right one of the trainers was holding Tanya’s left forearm. Tears were pouring down her face. But she was not the only one making sounds – there were timid cries, gasps and faint wailings to be heard from those junior players who were closest to the doors.

 

Tanya suddenly spotted Celia and made another try at getting loose – without succeeding. Their eyes met briefly – Celia was shocked seeing the expression on the face of her school mate – she had never seen her face like that before.

 

-Celia … This time it was not a cry – she could hardly get the words through. -It is ... it is ... he is ... She dropped to the ground as the trainer released his grip of her arm. With both knees on the surface she kept sitting still while tears trickled down her cheeks, some making their way off her face to drip down between her legs.

 

Celia made a few fast steps forward and glimpsed Johnny coming towards her. -Celia … don’t come – don’t go in. But he did not stop her. She went past him up to the open door of the women’s senior locker room.

 

The chock from seeing Tanya was a trifle compared to what hit her this time. A lightning strike. She felt her blood draining from her head and face. Completely stiff – unable to move any fiber in her body – she kept staring into the locker room entrance corridor.

 

Daddy. Linda. It is happening over again.

 

A few yards inside the door – partly on the floor, partly on a small bench being placed along the wall – she could see Peter. Even though it was fairly dark inside, she saw the blood in his hair and on his face – it was clotted creating strange patterns on his forehead and cheeks, like clouds containing lots of rain and thunder. At one or two spots the blood still seemed a little wet. The open eyes appeared to stare blankly up at the locker room ceiling.

 

Tiny tears starting to slide down her cheeks made the feelings return to her face. She did not resist when Johnny overtook her, putting his arm around her shoulder and leading her carefully away from the door.

 

-Come Celia. I’ve had a look at him – there’s nothing we can do here.

Chapter 29

Another meeting of the board

 

Philip took a long look across their faces. Some of them were sitting in the rather small sofa or in the chairs accompanying it – a couple of others were seated on extra chairs he had placed around the table for the occasion. It was not a table particularly suited for a meeting. But then there were no documents they were to look into or any prepared proposals they were supposed to discuss today.

 

He called them all yesterday night and asked for the meeting. The club house being fully contained, he chose to take it here. In his small flat. His boss at work had granted him the whole day off, so he used a short hour before lunch tidying up a little in the living room and the small hallway.

 

I do not always keep it too clean and neat at home. It just gets that way when I’m living on my own.

 

That was after his review with the police in the morning. And their conversation. He could reply to most of their questions, even if he asked the police woman to inquire more about Peter and his background in the club from a couple of others. Like Johnny. Who knew him better and had been around with him for a longer time.

 

There were no smiles or none of the cheerfulness they used to enjoy at their meetings. Which would have been highly inappropriate. He made time to brew a pot of coffee before they arrived, and except for the accountant they were now all sitting with a cup in one hand carefully sipping at what he offered. They seemed to appreciate the coffee. It provided for something to keep them occupied – literally something to keep – at a time when the reason for them being together was rather hard to get a grip on.

 

No one had declined his invitation, so the complete main board of the club was assembled in his living room. In addition he had made a call to Sonia asking her to join them – she was strongly involved last time and bound to be present.

 

-Linda was terrible. He made no attempt at any introduction, jumping immediately into the difficult topic. It was better giving some more practical information as the meeting progressed.

 

-With the cup ... not to mention her daughter ... and ...

 

He viewed them all once more. Though some were looking down into their coffee cups, most of them had their eyes turned straight at him.

 

-But Peter is ... I do not want you to misunderstand me ... Peter is ... different. Peter is ... was ... ours.

 

He was forced to stop again. He had not expected it to be this difficult to put the right words to what he was to convey. Emma came to his rescue.

 

-We understand what you want to say, Philip. Peter was one of us. And he was one of the young ones we invested in – maybe the one we believed in more than anyone else.

 

-Thanks a lot, Emma.

 

-You know that I’ve been around for a long time, she continued. -And I remember Peter from he started out here as a little boy. Maybe as well because he was living close by. I think he was a kind of natural leader even early on.

 

The beginning of a soft smile appeared on Emma's face as she ceased her recollections.

 

Philip had recovered. -So this time we have to engage as a club. The funeral of course. Keeping in contact with his family – both his parents are living nearby. The police informed them last night. And I have spoken to his father on the phone this morning.

 

-And we’ve got a difficult – but extremely important – task towards the children and the youngsters. He was training several teams and has recently trained even more than those he was busy with at the moment. He’s held coaching courses – and referee courses. A lot of our young ones have been involved in what he’s been doing. How do we approach them? – to tell them what has happened? – all together, team by team?

 

Johnny was the one to speak. Philip did in no way object to that – on the contrary, he was hoping this meeting could be carried through in this way – all of them speaking freely about what had taken place and what they needed to do for the immediate days ahead.

 

-First of all I think we should call off all activities for some days – at least until the weekend. Once more it was Emma thinking clearly. -It’s a matter of being ... descent. And when we start up again – whether it will be at the down-field-pitch or the club pitch, I suggest that one of us attends a training session of each of the teams for which Peter has been the coach – now or earlier on. So that we can meet and tell each of those players face-to-face.

 

There was a nod from most of the heads around the table. Philip once more took charge.

 

-Then I’ll send an email to all our coaches and team leaders. And I will get the guy working with our website to put out a message on our home page – I think I’ll write those words myself. And this time we have to contact the local paper as well.

 

-Call Christine. Sonia looked over at Philip. -Then we’ll be sure it gets … She searched for proper words – finding some sounding right was almost impossible. -… as good as it may be.

 

-Can any of you tell something about what happened last night, or ... what do we know about ... the killing?

 

The question came from a woman sitting straight across the sofa from Sonia. She was in her early thirties, and Sonia knew her to be a person involved in the women’s first team  - maybe representing them in the board? She noticed several of those around the table startling.

 

It is the first time anyone has used that word directly. It was not frequently pronounced last time either.

 

-You were there, Johnny. Philip looked across at the older man after some seconds of silence.

 

-I was in the men’s first team locker room. As usual Johnny’s voice affected the others calmingly. -Went in there from the small canopy at the far side – what we somewhat humorously use to call «the players' tunnel». I heard nothing until she shouted – so I think ... it ... happened before I came into the locker room.

 

-Who was the one shouting? It came from Emma.

 

-One of the players from the women’s team. There was no scheduled activity in the women’s locker room last evening, as the team had the day off. But I heard later on that she came there in order to look for or fetch some outfit she’d left in the room the day before.

 

He paused taking time to sip a little from his coffee cup and noticed that all eyes were now cast straight at him.

 

-I got out fast. As you know the entrances to the two locker rooms are located side-by-side. She was standing in the door opening – I walked past her, and there ... he was lying. One of the coaches came running – the junior kids were about to take off for a match – followed by several of the boys. I tried ... and I think I managed ... to stop them from coming too close to the door.

 

-Except for one of the junior girls, he added after another short break. -I guess she was there because of the boys. He was not quite sure why he added this last comment.

 

A tiny chill commenced in Sonia’s head and propagaged downwards causing a sting in her chest. -Do you know who it was? The question came quickly.

 

-I think her name is Tanya. She must have made it to the entrance – I don’t know how. She was ... very distressed. One of the grown-ups took care of her.

 

-And then … He took a long look at Sonia. -Celia.

 

The chill in her head got even colder and she felt another sting. -Celia? Are you sure? Did she see him?

 

Johnny nodded. The usual clear voice broke somewhat up as he continued. -I’m afraid, Sonia, that I might have prevented her. But there was something inside me ... I do not know what ... stopping me from doing it. So she went in. I followed her and then brought her back out. And sat with her for a while. And there was one of the junior boys - he came up and ... stayed there with us.

 

-She and Peter were coaching a team together. This last statement was meant for them all – as to explain.

 

Celia. Not one more time. My God – what is there ... with that girl?

 

It was once more Philip’s turn. -The junior coach called the police – and me. It’s not too far to walk from here, so I arrived at the club square after a few minutes. We made sure that all the kids were taken home – either by car or accompanied by foot.

 

-Of course there was no going away for a match, he added.

 

Celia with her referee’s whistle when Linda fell to the ground. Celia running for Mariam’s father. Celia who came jogging when Laura was there – in the locker room. Celia on the big-stone. Telling about her dad. -It was I ... finding him.

 

Sonia realized that she had been shutting out the voices and everything else around her for some time. She did not know for how long – seconds? A minute?

 

It’s an ability – or the opposite? – I possess. I think I developed it during my first time here.

 

- … something hard – they mentioned a hammer, but I do not think they know – and I cannot remember having seen any hammer around in the women’s locker room.

 

-What was Peter doing in our locker room? The woman in her early thirties once again.

 

Sonia observed their eyes seeking each other around the table. But there was silence – no one attempting to answer.

 

-I must be off. Have promised to help out down in the locker room. Sonia could hear his voice inside her head. But no mention of whom or what.

 

Besides – that was not last night. It was the day before yestersay.

 

And still – what if I’d asked him? … maybe they agreed to continue … the next day.

Chapter 30

The next day

 

She wanted to be the first one to come, so she arrived ten minutes earlier than the time they agreed. She picked a small table in the innermost corner with a view to the narrow street outside and placed her backsack next to the comfortable-looking chair.

 

Sitting down she sensed the heat from the radiator on the wall below the table. The autumn was about to make its mark – yes, it was fairly chilly walking the half mile over here from her small flat. So she appreciated the warmth.

 

Normally it would be rather cosy sitting like this enjoying the warmth against her legs and viewing the autumn weather outside. But as it was, «cosy» was a description far off what she was feeling inside her – and even farther off the mood she was afraid would be between them when Celia was to arrive.

 

I’m a little nervous. I remember one year back – the day after she found her dad. That was of course even worse. But now there is in a way a bit more uncertainty. I do not know what to expect – what state she is in – how I should approach it.

 

But I’m actually good at such situations, am I not? I have on many occasions been speaking to people being vulnerable – it somehow comes with what I’m doing. Even so it is different dealing with Celia – I know her too well – she is a ... good friend.

 

Christine picked up her phone from the cafe table and swept through the notes she had taken from Philip’s call a little more than an hour ago. Philip clearly and consistently described the events of last afternoon, and she made sure to break in asking the questions needed in order to get an image as complete as possible. She used to be good at that too – being a part of her job as well.

 

All the same you could tell that he’s speaking on behalf of the club. His story is somewhat coloured by that fact. And this is of course a terrible thing for the club.

 

And apart from that he is not actually a firsthand witness – he arrived at the scene only after a short while. Therefore I rather wish to speak with Celia.

 

Oh my God – That’s not why I want to meet Celia. It’s because – she is ... yes, she ...

 

Christine’s stream of thoughts was interrupted by a squeaky sound from the front door beyond the counter as Celia was entering the small coffeehouse room.

 

She called Celia late in the morning – after a colleague told her that the high school had sent all students home. It was not easy saying or asking too much on the phone – Celia was rather quiet, and Christine did not want to pull anything out of her. So she suggested they could meet here in the afternoon. She got an immediate «yes» in return.

 

Celia lived somewhat farther away from the coffeehouse than Christine did, so she spent a few more minutes getting there. She made an attempt at working with the thoughts and feelings in her head and body while walking – to try to create some order in the chaos inside her. The cool autumn air was kind of help, and she thought she succeeded a little bit.

 

Nonetheless the images from the evening before were rolling over and over again through her head. As they had been doing for most of the night and this morning.

 

It does not make any sense. I am not able to understand it. But I have to find some meaning. I must understand. And to get there I have to think clearly.

 

Peter’s open eyes staring blankly into the air – that was the worst image of them all. Johnny coming and bringing her out. He took her carefully with him up to a couple of small tree stumps marking the edge of the clubhouse square. They sat there for a while.

 

She did not remember whether she spotted Simon at once as he came over to where they were sitting. She just suddenly realized that he was standing there – a couple of yards from the stumps. Instinctively she started drying tears from her cheeks – for some reason she did not want them to be there. But then she glimpsed – eyeing through her tears – the tormented look on his face and dropped it.

 

I don’t care having him watch me crying now. Not this time. And it does not matter in any case.

 

She appreciated that he did not say anything. At least what she could catch. But he kept standing there. Until a grown-up woman – Celia did not know her – came over and told them she was taking them home. They were sitting side by side in the back seat of the woman’s car until they reached the birch street – Simon was the first of them to be off.

 

I think he tried to say something as he stepped out of the car. But it just vanished. So there was just a «bye».

 

But he surprised her when he abruptly reopened the door, put his head inside and looked straight at her. -Celia ... I’m sorry. Then he was rapidly gone.

 

Whatever he might mean by that. I do not think I answered – possibly uttering a couple of indistinct words.

 

Mom was startled when the car woman rang the doorbell telling that there had been an accident over at the club ground – even more so as she saw the looks of Celia. Eventually Kelvin managed to calm her. After that he pulled Celia into his room and placed her on the edge of his bed. They were sitting together for a long time – she figured. He let her tell her tale in her own way. No questions. He even turned off his computer.

 

I think I have never seen his PC turned off before.

 

She fell asleep long into the night. Uneasily. And she woke up several times. The same images. The thoughts. The questions.

 

Peter. What have they done to you? And what have you done? Why were you in the women’s locker room? We are going to train together. I’m going to the coaching course with you. We’re going to ... And Tanya ... what about Tanya?

 

Mom insisted she ought absolutely not go to school. But fortunately Kelvin woke her up – had he been sleeping at all? --- he was never awake this early in the morning.

 

-I’m going to school. I can’t cope staying at home.

 

-Should I go with you? Kelvin had asked. -Part of the way maybe? But she shook her head. -I’ll be fine.

 

It turned out to be a short day at school. This time the principal opted for a different approach – addressing all the students together. As early in the day as possible. Many of the students were club players, and in addition to that the junior kids – all of them attending the local high school – had been present at the club square when it happened. Furthermore Peter was himself a student here not too many years ago. This affair was a concern for the school in a totally different way than what was the case as regards the previous death.

 

So she had a quick briefing with the teachers when they met at halv past seven asking them to bring all students to the auditorium at the start of the first class. Having spoken to the police late last night, she tried to the best of her ability to recount in a clear and calm way the main parts of what had occured at the club ground the afternoon before, saying what she considered important to convey. There was to be no school classes today – they would all get the rest of the day off. But unless they were given any contrary message, school and classes would be as scheduled the next day.

 

There were several reactions in the auditorium – and a few questions. Most of them she could not answer. She added, however, that they were welcome to talk to their own teacher before going home – if they felt the need to inquire some more or just have a small talk. -And, she concluded, - please feel free to speak with your parents at home – it is better for you to express what is on your minds than keeping all thoughts to yourselves.

 

The house appeared empty when Celia locked herself in and entered the hallway late in the morning. She knew that mom would be out – she was working for some hours today. Had Kelvin left the house as well? – no, his outdoor clothing was here. At the top of the stairs she observed the door to his room being shut. So he had returned to bed.

 

Thanks for last night, Kelvin.

 

She went into the living room and sat down in her favorite sofa corner curling both legs close to her upper body. She was still sitting here when Christine called an hour later.

 

-Hi Christine – nice to get into somewhere warm.

 

Celia had walked over to the cafe table. -I can see you have been shopping already, she went on nodding at a small plate with two pieces of cake. -For me too? I like those.

 

Christine looked up at her smiling briefly. Maybe it was good to start with something ordinary. Like cakes. Even if it was just an outwardly-thing.

 

An everyday scene. Two girls getting together to chat.

 

And in a way that’s what it is, Christine thought.